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some stuff i've written about My Life

Summer’s End (August)

Since I left God the Father I have fallen in love with the earth that has always been my home. Allowing myself to feel this way about the reality around me has done more for the God-shaped hole in my heart than my Father in Heaven ever did. But…

Summer’s End (July)

Today I feel the ache of summer’s mortality, as July blazes out in a crescendo of sun and heat and humidity and I can feel in my skin that suddenly more summer is behind us than in front of us….

a to-do list for disoriented humans

sometimes people ask how the fuck we’re suppose to find meaning in an ultimately meaningless and absurd universe; for me, this is part of the answer.

a love letter to my friends (in late spring this year)

you should have been here by now. for six months i have been staring out this window at the naked trees, watching the snow fall and melt and waiting to share spring with you i was going to buy $100…

Disconnect

We didn’t have internet in our house until I was in high school. I have no idea how we learned stuff, or where our music came from, or how we knew how to cook vegan butternut squash soup. Paper, I…

for Keenan, if you find this

Yesterday when I picked you up from school you said to me: “Today we got to do whatever we want to in school. Guess what I did?” I guessed that you made music on an iPad, because I know how…

The Last Day of July

I am surrounded by gremlins with good hearts and under-developed brains. This is what I tell myself as I collapse into our big yellow armchair (IKEA STRADMON) and survey the wreckage of an ordinary summer day in a house with…

Toby (a Love Story)

“Don’t you think that dog is beautiful?” she asks, showing me a picture of a pit bull on the animal adoption website for the hundredth time. She sees something in them that I just can’t quite find, and believes with…

To Lose Myself in Earth's Shallow Soil

I feel the soil of our planet growing thinner. It’s becoming more difficult to find space where we can send our roots down deep, for strength and water and life. Do you know what this feels like?

day 8: for one perfect moment

This afternoon a child born from a spark of my own DNA fell asleep with his head on my chest, and for one perfect moment all was right in this fucked-up world.