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some stuff i've written about sexy

Abercrombie and Fitch Models

A Letter to Abercrombie

Dear Mr. Abercrombie & Fitch, Nobody likes you anymore. You messed up. You said that you only want the cool kids wearing your brand. You don’t want to sell clothes to anybody who doesn’t fit your ideal of sexiness. You…

Juicing

The Worst Juice Cleanse Ever

Last Thursday I skipped breakfast and had pizza for lunch. I had pizza for supper too, if those stale circles of hard dough anemically sprinkled with cheese and sold shrink-wrapped and frozen can be called “pizza”. I wish I could…

Fitness: In the Gym

The Worst Work-Out Plan Ever

Five days a week, I roll out of bed and stumble into the gym half-asleep. I don’t warm up before lifting. I don’t drink water whilst in the gym; I drink coffee. I don’t track my progress from week to…